Resolutions At the Office This Chinese New Year

We at the office think New Year’s resolutions are one of the most overrated things in the world. Well, it should at least be right up there with yoga and Keanu Reeves. In most cases, after all, nothing really changes, and the resolutions that we make at the start of the year fade quickly into empty promises we’d made to ourselves but had not followed through on. Like this year: it hasn’t even been a month and the people who had vowed to lose weight have once again begun eating from their yogurt ice cream cups at lunch breaks.

 

Shall we try harder? Chinese New Year should at least give us an opportunity to do so. Everyone in the office agrees with that. If there’s anything we’ve learned from the traditions and superstitions of the Chinese, it’d be a lot easier to drastically change one’s life with a dash of good luck and a Feng Shui-inspired scrupulousness. In this light, we each came up with new resolutions to herald the Chinese New Year. Well, we came up with resolutions for each other; that way, you know, there’s a prevailing sense of accountability. Here’s the first part of the list:

 

Carl, copywriter: He ought to get more organized. We mean really. As a copywriter he can’t keep working on a client’s required items at the last minute. What if there’s a change in direction? What if he leaves insufficient time for proofreading? What if – knock on wood – what if he misses a deadline? The whole creative team will be accountable, and our jobs will all be put at risk. He’s a terrific wordsmith, we can never deny that, but no reform will be better for us and for Carl than when he works with a proper sense of time. Our Chinese New Year gift to him? An online calendar to help organize his life.

 

Paul, account manager: He should resolve to pray more often to Saint Anthony of Padua. Isn’t Saint Anthony the patron saint for the recovery of lost items? Well, Paul has a penchant for losing and misplacing all kinds of bits and pieces; his office desk is a mess, with a scattered miscellany of ball pens, personalized photo mouse pads, strategic briefs, candy wrappers, business cards, erasers, vitamin capsules, office certificates, and CDs. Lost in all this chaos is his own identity – metaphorically and literally. One day Paul realized he couldn’t find his newly printed box of business cards. He had an important meeting scheduled that day, a meeting which was supposed to present lots of networking opportunities, to be aided of course by business card exchanges. He found the cards a week later behind a Barack Obama photo frame. If only he prayed to Saint Anthony.

 

Dianne, graphic artist: She’s creative. She’s idiosyncratic. She carries a denim purse and wears men’s clothes. We have no qualms at all about Dianne’s work, which has saved us in many a professional crisis and creative block, but she’s very odd and antisocial. She’s not only a grumpy morning person; she’s a grumpy whole day person and she doesn’t even have Facebook. Our Chinese New Year’s resolution for Dianne? That she interact once a day with the human beings around her – or at least hate the world less. We’ll help by bestowing upon her one of these really cool photo mugs.

 

(To be continued)

 

Tags: business cards, Chinese New Year, Holiday Gifts, New Year’s resolutions, office certificates, online calendars, photo gifts, photo mouse pads, photo mugs, printable business cards, printable office certificates